Television
May 22, 2012

DWTS: LAST DANCE BEFORE THE FINALS

Even with having the highest scores of the night, Maria couldn’t make it to the finals. Something in the milk ain’t clean! I think Katherine played the sympathy card with that slip up in her last performance and the powers that be (*cough, producers, cough*) weren’t going to let the sweetheart of the competition leave, and take their ratings with them! Alas, the show must go on. There were two rounds consisting of judge’s pick and everyone’s favorite: the freestyle.

William was given the Cha-Cha by the judges. His routines are very, “1, 2, 3, and 4..” but his hips have hypnotized the judges into seeing Fred Estaire instead of Fred “Twinkle Toes” Flinstone on the dancefloor (30). The freestyle gave the crowd what they wanted to see, an open shirt! Len, however, said what I was thinking. It was very predictable. All lifts to showcase his strength and little choreography (29).

Katherine’s Paso Doble was strong and entertaining. She is very aware that William could win this competition on fan votes because his hips don’t lie (I don’t know what that means. The man has a killer ass!). Donald is so underrated, but he’s made it to the finals, so she knows he is going to bring it tonight. With these thoughts looming over her head, she did what she knew she had to do; give an entertaining freestyle. She put everything into it. That’s what you’re supposed to do! (30)

Donald was the closer for both rounds. Let me start by saying, his partner Peta has thrown down the gauntlet in the “hottest body on Earth” competition! Food, why must though tempt me, slutty temptress! Back to the dancing. First up was the Argentine Tango. So sultry, so sensuous…so why can’t Len give the man a damn 10?! Donald shook it off and came back with a freestyle that trumped EVERY dance in this entire season! Period! It was just that good! He even found the only black country singer (Hootie doesn’t count) to give a live performance during his dance! By miles, the BEST performance of the night! If you didn’t catch it, go online and google, “Brotha gets downtown Julie Brown to a linedance.” I’m pretty sure this dance will be top three in the search engine. He wants to win, and wouldn’t it be great for the underdog to come out on top? It’s not going to happen, but it’s a nice thought.

The top 2 will do a final dance tonight to determine the winner. I’ll be with my family down South, cuddling with the cutest nephew in the world, so this is my final blog of the season. Once again, I’d like to thank all the loyal fans who read this weekly blabbering from the voices in my head. I send you all virtual hugs because I’m sure if I knocked on your doors to give them to you, I’d find you in front of your computer in Sunday underwear on a Tuesday morning. On second thought, here’s a virtual high five! Be kind to one another. One Love. Demi xoxo