Sep 21, 2011


Admittedly, I have never before this year watched the Emmy Awards wire-to-wire. I am much more of an Oscars kind of fella. So the entire time I’m watching I am making comparisons, furiously taking notes on every detail and at the end I have scrawled something that resembles the undeciphered plans sent by aliens in the movie Contact. Here is a much simpler version, with of course highlights of the winners.

First thing I noticed: The frenetic pace of the show. Before I sat down, Modern Family had already staged its coup on the comedy awards.

Outstanding Comedy Series Modern Family. Final award of the evening, felt like the 2004 Oscars when Return of the King won best picture and everything else. Obligatory at that point.

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series – Melissa McCarthy (Mike & Molly). Absolutely my favorite moment from this show when all the nominated actresses of this category came to the stage as their names were announced. After Melissa’s surprising victory, they gave her a tiara and roses. A wonderful show of solidarity from some great actresses.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series – Jim Parsons (The Big Bang Theory). Seems like a nice guy, I don’t watch the show.

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series – Julie Bowen (Modern Family). And host Jane Lynch gets snubbed. Maybe I should start watching this show.

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series – Ty Burrell (Modern Family).Modern Family also took the awards for directing and writing. Second thing I noticed? How many more awards there were than the Oscars to be squeezed into three hours. So many awards, so many awkward presenters bleating out weakly written banter. Is it necessary? Instead of rushing Martin Scorsese off the stage during his speech can we not skip Will Arnett and Zooey Deschanel’s thirty seconds of awful? At least they had the good sense to load Charlie Sheen up with thorazine before trotting him out there. Only winners are allowed on that stage folks. From that drama to this drama:

Outstanding Drama SeriesMad Men. Four years running. The best, in my opinion. Every episode is a writing clinic.

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series – Juliana Margulies (The Good Wife). This show is on the list of shows I would watch if I already did not watch too damn much. Nine nominations and one win.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series – Kyle Chandler (Friday Night Lights). Goes to show you what a Knute Rockne never quit attitude can do for your show. Kicked off of networks and relegated to directv its last season, the Panthers take Emmys for actor and writing in a drama series.

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series – Margo Martindale (Justified). It’s great that actresses who don’t look like Juliana Margulies are getting their just recognition.

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series – Peter Dinklage (Game of Thrones). This one made me jump up and smack my nacho-stained hands together. My favorite character from my favorite show wins. Programs like this are the reasons why I have no time for Modern Family or The Good Wife.

The aforementioned Martin Scorsese won for directing the Boardwalk Empire pilot. Otherwise the boardwalk was in its off-season as it’s seventeen other nominations went elsewhere. Aside from banal presenters, the show wasn’t bad. Jane Lynch was fun, and her opening song/sketch was fairly amusing. Certainly less pomp and circumstance versus the Oscars (third thing I noticed) and support! I got up to make a sandwich during The Lonely Island performance as soon as I heard the words Michael Bolton. There is not nearly enough hipster irony in me to watch that. Let’s hope that Eddie Murphy does even better at the Oscars this year. We’ll compare a white lesbian women and a black man. Until then let’s watch some more TV.