Television
Mar 23, 2012

JERSEY…NOT SO SHORE (SURE?)

Last night Jersey Shore wrapped out its fifth season with a reunion episode. But the real question on everyone’s mind is will the dysfunctional housemates be back for a sixth season? Though neither Snooki’s pregnancy or Mike’s admittance of a prescription drug addiction were mentioned in last night’s episode (presumably because it was taped before this news broke), it’s clear those factors will have an impact on the future of the shore house.

After five season’s of this being America’s guilty pleasure has reality… well, over-taken reality? I mean let’s face it, will an audience even tune it, let alone enjoy, seeing new Mommy Snooki partying so hard she gets arrested on the beach? And will Mike’s evil pranks and crazy rants seem so funny knowing his ‘crazy’ is at least partly the result of a concoction of pills. And if these aren’t the behaviors on the horizon, are we even watching the same show?

Perhaps it was time…all good things must come to an end. Maybe the cast could sense this would be their final chapter together as spin-offs have long been in the works. But first, let’s look back.

The season was characterized by a few things. We stared with cast’s relief of no longer being in Italy (READ– so excited to GTL stateside that Pauly burned of his face). Then the focus of the season become the looming rumor that Snooki cheated on Jionni with Mike, and Mike was determined create a ‘situation’ with the help of his friend ‘The Unit’. There was also Vanessa, Pauly’s stalker which made for some interesting moments, ‘meatball problems’ that almost cost the girls their jobs at the T-shirt shop, and a depression funk and brief hiatus for Vinny followed by a comeback that included two lesbians in the final episode. JWoww almost pushed Roger away with her insecurities but remained the house ‘Mom’, and Sam and Ronnie, well got along and that’s news enough!

There were also a few activities thrown into the mix besides drinking and bar hopping which included a camping trip (aka furniture rearrangement) and fishing for crabs, no pun intended, which spawned the whole ‘shark/sharp’ incident. It was a silly season but when it ended we left the house basically at peace. Mike ‘revealed’ his tryst with Snooki to a disbelieving Jionni, and it seemed Nicole was ready to just be friends again with Mike by the time the cabs were called. Sammi and Ron left in a taxi together, stating for the first time ever they would actually miss the house and felt great about their future. Bromance Pauly D and Vinnie were back to their old ways and promised to call each other. Jenny and Roger were back as the happy couple complete with a sex toy date in the smush room.

But somewhere between then and the reunion, Sammie & Ron broke up. Normally no shocker but after a fight-less season, it came as a bit of a surprise. Both blamed ‘hectic schedules’. At least if we do make it to Season 6, we are guaranteed the return of that drama. Mike decided to reignite the fire with Snooki and even dramatically walked off stage (only to have JWoww convince him to come back), Mike eventually apologized but said he was tired of being made out to be the ‘bad guy’ in the house. Didn’t he call himself the villain?

Either way, on the final episode, we were left with a toast that the crew would be back in the shore house next summer and while this was not confirmed or denied in the reunion episode, it seems unlikely to me.

Snooki is already committed to her spinoff with Jenni, yet untitled, filming in Jersey City. It will follow the two of them living in a house with the focus on their relationships, their families, and their friends (outside the shore housemates). It will be a more reserved look at the stars lives…”the non-party” side of them. Add in what it’s like for Snooki to be pregnant as an unexpected focus because pretty soon she will have a little guido/guidette. Both Jenni and Nicole have been seen pushing strollers with dolls (guess they are practicing!) around Jersey. Let’s see if they can capture America the way the Kardashian sisters have in this new look into their lives.

Pauly D will be taking on Vegas in his spin-off The Pauly D Project, which is set to premiere next week (March 29th, 10:30pm on MTV after Punk’d…I know, I was thinking ‘That show is still on the air’ too!). The cameras will be documenting his life away from Seaside as he makes the transition from fist-pumping housemate to Celebrity DJ. “Yeah, Buddy!” He will be bringing his childhood friends from Rhode Island along for the ride. Vinny’s been bumped for Pauly’s long-time friend and mentor Biggie. We will also follow Pauly as he accompanies pop star Britney Spears on her “Femme Fatale” Tour. Vegas aside, I’d place my bets on this spin-off because Pauly D has already legitimized his career by signing as the resident DJ at the Hard Rock Hotel and signing a deal with 50 Cent’s G-Note Records.

Will they be back? Who knows! Will we be watching?

You know we will.